E. J.: Come!

WILLOUGHBY: I think I’ll stay.

E.J. : Willoughby, COME!

W: NOM NOM NOM. This grass is delicious. You should try some.

E.J.: You get over here right now!

W: I can see your nose hairs from here. I do not think that is what The Dog Whisperer would call calm assertive, nom nom.

E.J.: We spent 10 weeks in obedience training. You ran to me every time I called you.

W: That’s because Dave the Drill Sergeant and his hungry German Shepherd were standing behind me. I’m pretty sure Dave hulks out when he gets mad.

E.J.: Hulks out?

W: Incredible Hulk? His clothes rip off his body?

E.J.: What do you know about the Incredible Hulk? You’re 3.

W: Street cred.

E.J. : Willoughby Jones…

W: You have reached the voicemail of Willoughby Jones. Please leave a message and I’ll return your call. BEEP.

E.J.: Potato

W: Potahto

E.J.: Tomato

W: Tomahto

E.J.: You know, you do sound a little like Ricky Gervais when you say it like that. But before we call the whole thing off, remember who feeds you.

W: I’m coming.